Thursday, May 25, 2006

Nike + Apple = Nipple!

Apparently Apple and Nike are teaming up to enhance your iPod experience. Apple will soon sell its "iPod Sports Kit" - which when paired with special Nike shoes (Nike+) will help you keep track of your work out. There seems to be some wireless plug that goes into your dock connector slot that receives signals from a sensor you jam into a special pocket on your Nike+ shoe. Apparently it gives you some vocal coaching, along with 'Nike Sport Music content' (yuck!).

Although the ad suggests it works just with the nano, I recall reading somewhere it might work with iPodVideo - just more to haul around.

Apparently, it will also allow you to share your data on the internet, and see who is kicking your ass on the track.

My thoughts:
-Sort of intrigued by this idea... but let's skip the whole shoe thing and come up with a cyberpunk body implant that will send those signals so it can be used with any sport! Wire the implant to your heart and bioelectric fields on the muscle groups you want to stimulate. Then sell the software module you need for the activity you do. Better yet, make the iPod an implant too. I want my Nipple™ implant today!

-Since I can't run anymore, because my hip joint is turning to powder, it's not much use to me. I'm wondering how many Nihonjin will suddenly become joggers because of this...

-If millions of poor kids get their moms to sew pockets on their non-Nike shoes - will it still work? Probably some stupid disclaimer on the warranty.

-If I take the freaking sensor and wave it around in the air for an hour or tie it to the pedal of my bike, can cheat my way to the top of the internet listing for runners? :-)

-If Barry Bonds uses one of these things, can we put an asterisk next to his name on any listing?

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